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I have a tendency to take on too much. I have a disease called volunteerism. I think it is great to volunteer, but taking on too many projects can be stressful. Every time I take on something new, I think “Now why did I do that right now when I am so busy?”. I have several projects I am working on now all of which I love.

So I was chiding myself for taking on another project and seeing the look in my husband’s eyes when I tell him. As a disclaimer, I know this is one of the reasons he loves me (my big heart he tells me), but he is right that I take on so much.

But something happened the other day when I was cursing myself for being so busy. My thought was, “But I love what I am doing. I love being busy. I love to work hard and accomplish a lot.” I was so relieved. I had finally accepted this fault of mine and made peace with it in my head.

So now when I start to stress, I quietly think “but I love this and I love to be busy”. And I can literally feel the stress leave my body and a smile reach my lips. I remember to appreciate the fact that I have choices. There are many in this world that have no choice at all.

I finished a book last night that I refer to as fluff. I am an over-thinker and like to read books that I consider oil and gas for my working brain. They usually involve history, opinion, current events, biographies or something like that. Recently I read, “The Tipping Point” by Malcolm Gladwell. That is an awesome book that will make you think. I had to stop reading it before bed because my mind went into overdrive. These books are a necessity. But there are times when I just want to enjoy a book and not have to think about what is being said. So for the past week or so I read “Sam’s Letters to Jennifer” by James Patterson.

It is a very easy read and quite enjoyable although a little sappy for me at times. One of the most interesting parts of the books, to me, was Sam’s relationship with Jennifer. Sam is Jennifer’s Grandmother and Jennifer points out that although she is very close to Sam, she doesn’t really know a lot about her life.

That got me to thinking (darn it!!!) about the wonderful older people in my life whom I think I know everything about (my Mom), but really know nothing. I know small details such as when she hula danced at a hardware store (this was in the early 60’s remember) and the time she tried to shoot her brothers with a b-b gun when she was little because they were taunting her, but I don’t know a lot. The book got me to thinking about what I would like to know from my parents.

So I have started writing down questions in a notebook I carry with me about questions I have or things I want to know so that the next time I see them or anyone I know and love, I will remember how important they are to me and how important their lives are.

This process has also made me more aware of my two children and how someday they too may want to know more about my life. So I try to document a little more and tell them more stories and let them know my likes and dislikes. I believe it may help them someday because I am sure when they are older, they will wonder why my husband and I make the decisions we do.

So I encourage you to get to know someone in your life who you may want to know better. Or just read Gladwell’s book if you are looking for a fictional example of how we truly don’t know even the people we think we know the best.

I believe we are defined by our actions in life. I think this is why I so enjoy reading biographies; most list the facts and actions taken in their lives. I can disagree with someone in their opinions and wonder why someone has made a certain decision in their lives, but it is hard to argue with the actions someone has taken.

For example, I recently went and saw a relative who likes to talk about the upcoming elections. He is a staunch republican so therefore the thought of Hilary Clinton in the White House sends him into an uproar. I don’t know who I am going to vote for.I don’t vote party lines. But I like to push the envelope sometimes to see what happens.

In my opinion, there are no bad or good politicians. They have to make decisions just like we do. So therefore they are influenced by what is happening at the time just like we are. Therefore they sometimes make decisions that may not seem in the best interest of the people. So I try to take a long look at the candidate and try to see as much of the whole picture as possible.

So when I talk to people such as my relative I always ask, “OK, I know you have listed all these things you don’t like, but what has she done that you do like?” This question sends my relative into a tizzy and I like it. I think it forces him to realize that not one of us is perfect. And usually, by the end of our heated conversations, he has in no way changed his mind, but he has opened it just a little bit. I benefit too because I keep up on the issues and my two girls see that everyone has a voice and should voice it. It’s fun.

In my last post, I talked about what inspires me.  It can range from something so small like a picture I saw in the doctor’s office to a story I read to a conversation I had, but the most important piece in all of these is what I do with what I learned.

For example, the picture I saw in the doctor’s office was  a woman named Jae Howell.  The picture is of an elderly woman, I believe in her 80’s, who is the picture of health.  She is a record holder for swimming and continues to swim. In fact, all of the pictures in this doctor’s office, are of older people probably 60 and above who continue to be active and live healthy lives.  I was so inspired by Jae’s photograph that I came home and looked her up on the internet just to see more about her.

 Now, that got me to the first stage which was taking some action, but the purpose of the photograph was to inspire me to make healthy decisions in my life.  Has it? In small ways yes, but I still don’t exercise like I want to.  I do eat better and get exercise with my kids, but I absolutely love to play Tennis.  How many times have I played Tennis this summer? A couple of times with my kids and because they are 5 and 8 I don’t really get a workout in. But I do find that Jae pops into my mind and helps me make small changes.

I guess the point of this post is that action is what makes the difference.  It is so hard to do sometimes too especially when your heart isn’t in it…like taxes…but it is necessary.

Connie