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I am a visual person and absolutely LOVE pictures. To me it has the ability to say so much. Not only are you being told a story, you can actually see it and see yourself interacting in the story.

So I have to admit that when my friend tells me her stories about training for a biathlon, I am interested and try to imagine what it is like. But until recently when she sent me a video clip of what she was doing, did I truly understand the hard work and commitment it takes to compete in this event. I mean she actually hits her targets after cross-country skiing a long distance. If you haven’t tried cross-country skiing yet, it is a kick-your-butt kind of workout, but so worth the effort and fun. So I knew my friend was working hard but…

the video says it all. I have attached it here and send comments if you want. I will make sure she gets them. As for me, I will always be inspired by her. View Biathlon Movie

Boy it is surprising how quickly you can get out of the habit of writing for the blog. It truly takes discipline that I have not had lately. Remember how I have said earlier that actions define a person – well I have not been very well “defined” lately. I have had personal successes, but they have led me away from writing. Back to it!

My friend Bryn who is training to be a biathlon athlete has been competing. I will be doing an interview on her shortly and will be posting that as my first big profile. She has two meets in February so I will update after that.

I received an amazing book for Christmas called, “Historica’s Women – 1000 Years of Women in History”. I LOVE this book. Mostly because it is a short history of each woman and there is a timeline of what is happening in history during this woman’s time. It really puts the trials and triumphs into perspective. We are all influenced by events both foreign and domestic, but this book does a great job of showing exactly how much. I have a few women I want to profile in the next few weeks so watch for that.
Also I completed a radio interview regarding the “Women Navigating Adversity” book which profiles my life and my life involved with the military. If you want to check it out, visit Army Wife Talk Radio and check out the interview for Feb. 11th. If you are involved with the military at all, you have to check out these women. They put their heart into their websites and interviews.

That’s it for today! Happy Monday!

I recently went on a girl’s weekend with 3 of my friends that I have known since Jr. High and High School. We try to go on trips once or twice a year. We are all busy so sometimes it can turn into every few years.

I have to say that I love these women. They truly are like my sisters. We all e-mail and talk all the time, but there is something special about when we all get together. All four of us are very different, but that is what I love most. We have great conversations about meaningful things. We catch up on each others families. We act silly. We disagree. But one of the greatest gifts to me is that I laugh. Not just giggles, but those deep-down-my-stomach-hurts laughs. I forget about all my responsibilities and just enjoy these wonderful women.

And on this last trip something else was very clear to me; what a great gift these women are to my two children. My girl’s don’t have one role model, they have 4. I don’t have to be an athlete, my friend is. I don’t have to be a scientist, my other friend is. I don’t have to be an environmentalist, my other friend is. What a relief to me that I have such wonderful women in my life that can help me shape the two girls I have into strong women. As a Mom I am very aware of how the decisions I make affect my children, so knowing that I am not on my own sometimes is a relief. I can point to any one of these women and tell my daughters, “well, look at her and what she is doing.”

I will forever cherish my friendship with these women. I look forward to the day when my girls will possibly join us on our trips.

As the holidays approach, I start to think of the people who I want to give gifts to this year. I start to get a little sad because I believe the true meaning of gift giving has been lost. There are people on my list that I feel obligated to gift and those on my list that I truly want to gift.

But for some on my gift list there are people who just want to tell me what they want. I get more and more bothered by this every year. I am tired of the materialism of “having to get someone something good” or feeling obligated. That is why I am a huge fan of random acts of kindness.

I have this fantasy where I have a lot of money and I just walk around giving money to anyone. I am not necessarily talking about the poor on the streets, but to everyone. I see hard work being done every day and to get an unexpected surprise like that I think would just spread kindness. What a gift!!!

I don’t even think I could tell you what I got for Christmas last year, but I can tell you that I got a cookie jar with lemons on it that my Mom left on my front door one day. I can picture clearly the Easter dress I was surprised with when I was about 10 years old and we didn’t have money for new clothes. I still have a huge petrified rock that my husband carried home on his lap over hundreds of miles on rocky terrain because I was so interested in Geology.

These are my true gifts in life. None were required gifts on a holiday, but all were given in the true nature of giving.

Just writing this down has inspired me to work to make changes in my family. I will post again on what I have come up with and if you have any ideas, send them my way!

We have a house that is being built across the street from us. The project has been going on for a few months so we have seen contractors come and go. They have started the painting process and I noticed the other day that there were a few cigarette buts in front of my house. The next day there were a few in my driveway and last night as I was coming home with my girls, the painters were leaving and I saw the passenger flick out a cigarette right into the middle of my yard.

My girls saw it and were appalled that they were littering. I was just mad. So I asked my girls to go inside and I told them I was going to go talk to someone. They knew what I was doing and wanted to be right in the middle of it. It was the end of the day, so I was just going over to see if the painters were coming back the next day. They were.

First thing this morning, my oldest asked me what I was going to do about the littering. I explained to her that I was going to go talk to them and explain that it wasn’t appreciated and they should stop. This pleased my 3rd grader to no end. I think it is because we are trying to really teach her what is right and wrong and it is something she deals with every day. It isn’t easy being a 3rd grader. So I knew that me standing up for what is right really meant something to her.

I did wait until after I had taken them to school. I didn’t know these people so I sure didn’t want my girls to see a real brawl. I went over and talked to the head painter. Her response was that they don’t flick cigarettes in peoples yard, just the street. I told her no that I even saw them do it and she could go check out my lawn to prove my point. She just said ok and I left. No brawl.

But now I can tell my daughter what happened so that she can see that sometimes it isn’t easy being an adult either, but that we have to stand up for what we believe in. If not, we just end up with butts in our yard.

A few weeks ago I started thinking about customer service. Personally I always say please and thank you, mostly because it is habit. As children, we are programmed to say it whether we mean it or not. I do it to my children as well. One of the things we always have our girls do when we go out to a restaurant is order for themselves and they say please and thank you. We always get compliments about their manners.

But I started to wonder if they actually understood why they need to use good manners. When I asked them they did and they didn’t. They are young so the true meaning of being thankful is just starting to emerge for them, but I started to examine how my good manners have just become habit.

So two weeks ago I decided to start really thinking about when I thank someone and how I thank someone. I have been amazed at the results. For example, I started really thanking people when I ordered food or thanking them for being quick on my order or just saying I appreciated it. The response has been great. I get genuine smiles. I haven’t had one wrong order. If someone asked me how my day was as part of their spiel, I always said great and how is yours. Two different times I got “Wow, thanks for asking.”

It was a great two weeks and is now part of my everyday. Most importantly, I feel truly thankful. That good to the bone feeling that puts a smile on your face even when you are stuck in traffic. It is a wonderful feeling that I highly recommend.

I have a tendency to take on too much. I have a disease called volunteerism. I think it is great to volunteer, but taking on too many projects can be stressful. Every time I take on something new, I think “Now why did I do that right now when I am so busy?”. I have several projects I am working on now all of which I love.

So I was chiding myself for taking on another project and seeing the look in my husband’s eyes when I tell him. As a disclaimer, I know this is one of the reasons he loves me (my big heart he tells me), but he is right that I take on so much.

But something happened the other day when I was cursing myself for being so busy. My thought was, “But I love what I am doing. I love being busy. I love to work hard and accomplish a lot.” I was so relieved. I had finally accepted this fault of mine and made peace with it in my head.

So now when I start to stress, I quietly think “but I love this and I love to be busy”. And I can literally feel the stress leave my body and a smile reach my lips. I remember to appreciate the fact that I have choices. There are many in this world that have no choice at all.

I finished a book last night that I refer to as fluff. I am an over-thinker and like to read books that I consider oil and gas for my working brain. They usually involve history, opinion, current events, biographies or something like that. Recently I read, “The Tipping Point” by Malcolm Gladwell. That is an awesome book that will make you think. I had to stop reading it before bed because my mind went into overdrive. These books are a necessity. But there are times when I just want to enjoy a book and not have to think about what is being said. So for the past week or so I read “Sam’s Letters to Jennifer” by James Patterson.

It is a very easy read and quite enjoyable although a little sappy for me at times. One of the most interesting parts of the books, to me, was Sam’s relationship with Jennifer. Sam is Jennifer’s Grandmother and Jennifer points out that although she is very close to Sam, she doesn’t really know a lot about her life.

That got me to thinking (darn it!!!) about the wonderful older people in my life whom I think I know everything about (my Mom), but really know nothing. I know small details such as when she hula danced at a hardware store (this was in the early 60’s remember) and the time she tried to shoot her brothers with a b-b gun when she was little because they were taunting her, but I don’t know a lot. The book got me to thinking about what I would like to know from my parents.

So I have started writing down questions in a notebook I carry with me about questions I have or things I want to know so that the next time I see them or anyone I know and love, I will remember how important they are to me and how important their lives are.

This process has also made me more aware of my two children and how someday they too may want to know more about my life. So I try to document a little more and tell them more stories and let them know my likes and dislikes. I believe it may help them someday because I am sure when they are older, they will wonder why my husband and I make the decisions we do.

So I encourage you to get to know someone in your life who you may want to know better. Or just read Gladwell’s book if you are looking for a fictional example of how we truly don’t know even the people we think we know the best.

I believe we are defined by our actions in life. I think this is why I so enjoy reading biographies; most list the facts and actions taken in their lives. I can disagree with someone in their opinions and wonder why someone has made a certain decision in their lives, but it is hard to argue with the actions someone has taken.

For example, I recently went and saw a relative who likes to talk about the upcoming elections. He is a staunch republican so therefore the thought of Hilary Clinton in the White House sends him into an uproar. I don’t know who I am going to vote for.I don’t vote party lines. But I like to push the envelope sometimes to see what happens.

In my opinion, there are no bad or good politicians. They have to make decisions just like we do. So therefore they are influenced by what is happening at the time just like we are. Therefore they sometimes make decisions that may not seem in the best interest of the people. So I try to take a long look at the candidate and try to see as much of the whole picture as possible.

So when I talk to people such as my relative I always ask, “OK, I know you have listed all these things you don’t like, but what has she done that you do like?” This question sends my relative into a tizzy and I like it. I think it forces him to realize that not one of us is perfect. And usually, by the end of our heated conversations, he has in no way changed his mind, but he has opened it just a little bit. I benefit too because I keep up on the issues and my two girls see that everyone has a voice and should voice it. It’s fun.

In my last post, I talked about what inspires me.  It can range from something so small like a picture I saw in the doctor’s office to a story I read to a conversation I had, but the most important piece in all of these is what I do with what I learned.

For example, the picture I saw in the doctor’s office was  a woman named Jae Howell.  The picture is of an elderly woman, I believe in her 80’s, who is the picture of health.  She is a record holder for swimming and continues to swim. In fact, all of the pictures in this doctor’s office, are of older people probably 60 and above who continue to be active and live healthy lives.  I was so inspired by Jae’s photograph that I came home and looked her up on the internet just to see more about her.

 Now, that got me to the first stage which was taking some action, but the purpose of the photograph was to inspire me to make healthy decisions in my life.  Has it? In small ways yes, but I still don’t exercise like I want to.  I do eat better and get exercise with my kids, but I absolutely love to play Tennis.  How many times have I played Tennis this summer? A couple of times with my kids and because they are 5 and 8 I don’t really get a workout in. But I do find that Jae pops into my mind and helps me make small changes.

I guess the point of this post is that action is what makes the difference.  It is so hard to do sometimes too especially when your heart isn’t in it…like taxes…but it is necessary.

Connie